Author: Matthew

I have recorded something
Over your recording
On TV.

And you were
Probably wanting
to watch it.

Forgive me,
Bear Grylls is
More entertaining
Than golf

Gorzycki

6

Will you be there?

When I was five and you thought I had cooties

I wondered if you would still want to be friends.

When we started middle school and you started having feeling for girls

I wondered if you would still stand by my side or leave for the first girl that walked by.

Will you be there when we go to high school and I grow into my body?

Will you notice me?

Those little hints I threw at you,

Will you follow the trail,

Or go towards someone else’s gingerbread house?

Even when you have fallen for me I wonder if you will stay.

Will you be there once we get married

Or do I not give you enough?

Will you still be there even when you have seen me at my worst?

Will you pity me?

Will you be scared of me?

What will you do when I am at my lowest point?

Will I be too much to handle?

Will you comfort me?

What about when we have spent years married together?

Will you wake up one day and decide you don’t want me anymore?

Instead of reassuring me of my insecurities,

Will you find the constant need for approval annoying?

Will you see the stretch marks trailing down my arms and legs,

And see them as the ugly scars reminding you of how fat I was?

Will you look at me and just see a stranger lying in your bed?

Will you walk to the bathroom,

Stare back at me through the mirror,

And decide…

You don’t love me anymore.

And you never knew if you did.

Will you?

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

I guess it’s karma
For all the nights I would purposefully keep myself awake
My own form of self-suffering
Of self-destruction
It was how I kept control
Taking away the one thing I thought I always had
Sleep

Now that’s what I can no longer do
I rest hour by hour
Minutes by minute
Nothing to nothing
All it does is make the dark circles under my eyes grow
They start shaping from color to formations
Now they’re bags
Insomniac or no

But in the end I’ll forever be a believer in the Art of Self-Destruction

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

If only you could see how beautiful you are
If only you could see what I see
You’d see the way you light up my world
By only just existing

Every time you smile
I swear my life becomes ten times more pure
Every time you laugh
I swear I become ten times more innocent
You opened me up to a new world
Surrounded by color and clarity
I don’t know where my life would be
If you were not right next to me

I watch the sun as it kisses your face
The way it sets your hair aglow
Or the way it lights up your eyes
And the piercing black becomes a startling brown in which I wish more to know

When you secretly tried to hide your tears
But I catch one rolling down your cheek
I would do anything to fight your demons
And hug you into a peaceful sleep

When you become angry
And try to hold in your frustration
All I can focus on is the cute way your button nose scrunches up
And I forget all of my agitation

When you laugh
It sets heaven alight
You are the cause for all the bright stars in the sky
That shine clearly in the night

If only you could see how beautiful you are
If only you could see what I see
You’d see the way you light up my world
By only just existing

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

She was the girl with the walls that stood tall.

She was the girl that appeared to have it all.

With joy in her heart and a skip in her walk.

She would bring a smile to your face every time she talked.

She looked like she could fight the dark.

She was the girl that would leave her mark.

But one day those walls came tumbling down.

And with that she lost her crown.

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

It’s just a number, right?

Wrong.
It’s your whole life.
You eat exercise.
You breathe pounds.
You see in numbers.
It begins to take over everything.

First it starts with exercise.
Minutes turn to hours.
Then you start to count calories.
Thousands turn to hundreds until they turn to nothing.
The numbers start to grow in your head.
They’re the last thing you think of before you go to sleep.

Second is weight.
The first few days your body aches from hunger, but soon you begin to fall in love with it.
The pain.
It reminds you that what you’re doing is all for not.

The first change you notice is your collarbone.
You notice that it’s starting to pop out more.
The next is in your hands.
The bones you used to never see start to move and become more visible.
Then your ribs start to appear a lot more when you breathe or stretch.
Your legs then begin to shrink and the gap starts to appear.
Your arms become skinnier and your face gives it all away.
The thinness and fragileness of it gives away that you’re dying inside.
The dark circles under your eyes contrast with your skin and those around begin to see how exhausted you are.

And there you have it.
You’re starting to die.
The pain is gone at this point, but the thing that remains is the emptiness you feel inside.
You’re hollow.
A shell with a soul long gone.
You no longer feel the life, the energy inside you.
You begin to wonder how long you’ll keep going.
What’s your breaking point?
Every pound seems to take away a bit of your spark.
Pretty soon there’s nothing left.
You begin to ask yourself, “Will this be the death of me?”
Will I let this consume me?
You begin to start thinking yes.
You don’t care if you’re starving.
You don’t care if you begin to lose the ones around you.
Because after all the numbers are what truly make you happy.

But its no big deal, right?
You don’t care.
The other’s around you either took too long to notice or ignored it.
You’ll be fine, right?
After all, you’re only dying?

It’s just a number, right?

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

I Believe In Darkness, I Believe In Light

Fear. Evil. Screams. Tears. Hate. The Fallen. Exhaustion.
Destruction. Poison. Harm. Wicked. Silence.
Sin. Pain. Slipping. Trapped. Crime. Immortality. Fear. Damnation.
Anxiety. Panic. Insecure. Fire. Fault. Addiction.
Demons. Storms. Death. Scared. Chaos. Sadness. Darkness.
I have fallen in love with the immoral.
Seeking comfort within the shadows.
There is something interesting about sin.
Like dancing with the devil.
The rush that comes from being bad.
I have fallen in love with the darkness.

I believe in darkness.
But I also believe in light.

Brave. Good. Laughter. Smiles. Love. Rise. Lively.
Creation. Heal. Pure. Life. Beginnings.
Warmth. Whimsical. Comfort. Secure. Hope. Family.
Happiness. Yours and Mine. Protection.
Positivity. Color. Present. Calm. Compassion. Light.
I have fallen in love with the righteous.
Finding joy in my innocence.
Constantly searching and discovering.
Like flying with angels.
The calm that comes from stability.
I have fallen in love with the light.

I believe in darkness.
But I also believe in light.

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

It allowed her to believe in color
To now see the world in a light anew
Her existence used to be much duller
But suddenly gray was replaced by blue

Years and moments that used to be a blur
But now time in her life starts to stand still
Dreams of happier times would defer
Her life was really only going downhill

She holds her happiness wrapped in a capsule
She holds her entire life in her hands
She has more soldiers to fight her battles
She now begins to push through the badlands

A world once surrounded by black and white
She is now unstoppable, now she fights

It taught her to see in color
To see the world anew
Her life used to be much duller
But now gray was replaced by blue

Days that used to be a blur
But now time stands still
Dreams of happier times would defer
Her life was only going downhill

Happiness was wrapped in a capsule
She holds her entire future in her hands
More soldiers to fight her battle
She begins to push through the badlands

A world once surrounded by black and white
She is now unstoppable, she found her reason to fight

L.C. Anderson High School

9th

Promise that you’ll be alright

Promise I’ll hold you tight through the night

I’ll always be there for you

Promise that you won’t go blue

Promise that I’ll be you’re protector

I promise that I’ll let no one hurt her

promise, Promise, PROMISE

Now I have nothing left to give

But I promise

Dedicated to my Promise

L.C. Anderson High School

9th